Cookaholics Bulletin Board

I wrote this awhile ago for a local newspaper -- it's true and whenever anyone tells me they get overwhelmed with cooking at this time of year, I think of this. I thought I'd share it as a Thanksgiving gift:

Several years ago, standing on the sidelines at one of my son's soccer games, I met a new woman in town. Besides her teenage son, who was my son's age, I found out the usual basics. She had two other children and had given up a career to stay at home to enjoy the children and family - but I didn't find out much else. A little later on I needed some help with a class project and she called to offer her help. We didn't really get to know each other beyond these meetings; she was more of an acquaintance.

So I missed out on hearing until quite late that she had developed cancer and, despite all of the treatments, was now at home in a hospice capacity. As so often happens a close friend had arranged a meal pool - people offering to cook meals 2 or 3 times a week and deliver them so the family would not be so reliant on take-out. Well, not only had she done me a favor but, as a cancer survivor, I could more than empathize with her condition. So offering to cook a meal didn't even require a second thought.

I didn't know much about her family, their tastes, any allergies, etc. and the meal had to be dropped off early, be reheatable, and be in a disposable container. Since I'm a great believer in comfort food I decided on a meat loaf, baked some corn muffins, prepped a salad, and dropped it off. It took maybe an extra ten minutes since I'd made the same meal for my own family, and cost - what - $6.00? I didn't really think about it and didn't even tell my family.

So my son, Sean, was more than surprised when her son grabbed him in the high school and said, without preamble, "Do you always eat that great every night?" After he explained a little Sean said, in essence, "yeah, that was pretty typical" and came home and told me - making me feel pretty darn good.

But what made me feel incredible was the phone call I received three weeks later - one week after she died. It was from the friend who had arranged the pool asking me for the recipe. It turned out that all of the family had liked the meat loaf so much that they had gone up to their mother's room and encouraged her to eat a few bites. She did, and it turned out to be the last meal the family ever shared together. Her mother wanted the recipe as a family heirloom.

Happy thanksgiving everyone -- and take pleasure in your friends, your family, and the incredible gift you've been given to be able to feed them well and with love.

Thank you so very much for sharing Lindsay, You are blessed with a wonderful memory as well as a story, I bet you never eat meatloaf without fondly thinking of this.

I do hope that we all will take the time this year and all years to look past the stress and focus on just how much we have to be truly thankful for...there is much.

For me and mine...we are blessed beyond measure.

Happy Thanksgiving all!

....wiping eyes dry.....

What a great story. Thanks for letting us in on something so special.

Beautiful story Lindsay. Thank you for sharing.
Nance

Wonderful story Lindsay...thanks for sharing.

Amy

Thanks Lindsay...I love the story. I have been making soup every week for the last few months for a friend whose husband is going through chemo and radiation. He is the cook in the family, so they have been missing out on home cooked food. Like your story, the good feeling I get everytime I talk to both of them far out weighs the cost and time to make the soups. It also reminds me to be thankful for my health.
Have a great Thanksgiving,
Ilene

Thank you for posting this... you're right. "Overwhelmed" is an over used word. It can be so much worse.

We went to a funeral home tonight of a hockey friend, boys the same age as mine, who died a month after a cancer diagnosis. We hugged ours a little harder tonight.

Hey, can we get that recipe for meatloaf?

I want to add my thanks too Lindsay. Sharing of food is so much more powerful than it seems on the surface. Our neighbor's 4 year old daughter died about 9 years ago. Before that we were friendly and my daughter was very good friends with both their children. When Caryn died I fed them. I offered to bring the food to them but they wanted to eat with us and so they did. Like Lindsay I concentrated on warming comfort food. We now have such a special bond with that family. They have an 8 year old son now and he is our godchild. We also spend every Christmas Eve with them which is very special as that is when the Swiss celebrate Christmas and it is usually only family. This is not a "food" family. They are not very interested in it and I am being generous if I call their cooking mediocre. Still the act of feeding them on that difficult occasion and them feeding us on their sacred day is somehow life defining. I think I somehow get caught up in the wow factor of cooking and do take a lot of pride in my successes. How much more amazing is it though how the act of bringing people together for a meal can have such deep meaning. That is what is overwhelming.

Mary

PS Hell yes I want that meat loaf recipe too.